DBT DEAR MAN (assertiveness)
Script framework for asking for what you need — especially in family and workplace duty conflicts.
When to use: Assertiveness with family, employer, or partner without aggression.
Script framework for asking for what you need — especially in family and workplace duty conflicts. Use the worksheet in session or as homework. Preview the layout on the right — tap it or choose View full preview below for the complete on-screen version.
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Describe · Express · Assert · Reinforce · Mindful · Appear confident · Negotiate
Describe facts (no judgment)
Express feelings & impact
Assert what you need
Reinforce why it helps both sides
Related resources
- DBT skillsDBT GIVE & FAST (relationship effectiveness)GIVE for keeping relationships; FAST for self-respect — pair with DEAR MAN for difficult family or workplace talks.
- DBT skillsDBT diary card (blank week)Track urges, skills used, and mood — weekly template for DBT-informed therapy.
- DBT skillsDBT distress tolerance: TIPPTemperature, intense exercise, paced breathing, progressive relaxation — crisis survival.
- DBT skillsDBT STOP skillStop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed mindfully — impulsivity and conflict moments.